I read this
article, and I have to share it with you all!
After
reading and laughing my way through this, I had a split second in which I felt
guilty. I felt guilty because we tried
for so long to get pregnant, I should be enjoying it, right?
Well – confession
time… I have not enjoyed being pregnant.
There are moments of joy! Like
feeling her move, watching my husband’s face when he felt her move for the
first time, or that moment of pure happiness when we see her during the ultrasounds! But pregnancy is kind of dumb…
Let me break
it down for you – in my own experience.
First
trimester – I basically spent the whole 3 months either puking or feeling like I
was going to puke. Nothing tasted good,
nothing sounded good because of the nausea, and I just felt “weird”
Second
trimester – started out decent, since the nausea started to ease up. Then my back started to hurt, to the point
where I now have to see my chiropractor twice a week just to maintain an
upright position… It’s getting better, I
don’t cry out in pain during adjustments anymore… but getting started was
rough. Then, I started to feel her tap
dance on my bladder…
Third
trimester – only a couple days in, so I really have no comment on this one
yet. Other than Little Miss Stretch-It-Out
has started the wonderful feeling of putting her tiny feet on my ribs and then
pushing as hard as she can – apparently she will continue to do this until she
gets here.
Throughout
this whole experience, I have had major anxiety – over small things that can
easily be controlled (how am I going to keep up with laundry, if bending over
makes me want to puke?) to things largely out of my control – (dear Lord,
please don’t let me poop during delivery, with a room full of people… although I
am hearing that it happens to everyone and I won’t care at the time)
My husband
and our moms have really been heaven sent through all of this. Between my husband picking up my slack
without complaint, to his mom reassuring me that it will all be just fine, and
my mom laughing with me at the silly “mom truth videos” that we find on Facebook
(and reassuring me that she will be right by my side the whole time) my
pregnancy really is a piece of cake!
I am trying
to count it ALL joy – since we prayed, and cried, and tried for so long to get
to this point. I have absolute ZERO
regrets about her. And even though there
are groups on Facebook who try to make parents seem selfish, or turn pregnancy
and motherhood into a “Mom of the Year Contest” (how horrible are people,
anyway?) I wouldn’t trade one thing for this!
I am thankful that I get to experience this at all – puke, poop fears,
and anxiety included!
I recognize
that not everyone gets this opportunity.
I thought I was one of those people.
But seriously, pregnancy has not been fun…