Psalm 139:16

My desk calendar has scripture on it for each day, today's is as follows:

You say me before I was born and scheduled each day of my life before I began to breathe - Psalm 139:16

When I read that this morning, it really struck me... He numbers our every step, He holds our every moment, and even knows the number of hairs on our head!

I have not enjoyed being pregnant - I have made no qualms about it.  I have been uncomfortable, I have felt sick, and my anxiety has been through the roof!  One thing I can certainly promise you though, is this.  I enjoy the miracle that I have been given.  I don't take this lightly. 

I know without a doubt that my life has always had purpose.  Either on the foreign mission field, or right here at home - growing our very own earth shaker!  We named her Diana, specifically because the name means Heavenly and Divine.  She is our gift from Heaven.  I know she is destined for GREAT things! 

He saw me before I was born... Before I took my first breath in a sinful world, He knew exactly who I was going to be and how I would turn out.  Even when I spent years running from Him, He knew exactly where I would turn back to Him. 

When it comes to being a mom... I have reservations.  Mainly because I am not sure I can handle the job.  However, I know I have a wonderful support system around me to make sure that if I stumble, I won't fall flat on my face.  I also know that mothering isn't perfect or easy for anyone.  There will be an adjustment period.  I will have to get used to being someone's life support.  I will have to get used to another human being in the house, when I am used to being alone. 

What I am VERY confident in is knowing that she is made for something more!  No matter what it is, she was made for it!  She may end up on the mission field, she may become a doctor or lawyer.  Shoot, she could become the worlds greatest auto mechanic!  Either way, she is destined for greatness!  She already has her very own fan club, who is almost beside themselves with anticipation to meet her! 

One thing I know beyond the shadow of doubt is that I will be her biggest fan, her biggest supporter, and will love her regardless.  I won't lie, I will be a little bummed if she doesn't share the passion for music that I have... But I already know that she is loved beyond measure.  She has a huge fan club waiting for her, and I am getting more and more excited to meet her every day!

That moment when you realize that YOU have been CHOSEN!!

You have been chosen by God who has given you this new kind of life.  Colossians 3:12

This scripture scrolled across my desk calendar yesterday, and it’s been on my mind ever since.  When I look at the whole chapter, and where this verse is referenced, I understand “new kind of life” to mean my life in Christ – being saved, taking Christ as my Savior.

However, thinking of it in terms of what is about to happen to our family – the birth of our first miracle – I can’t help but believe this came across to me yesterday to reinforce that I have been handpicked to be Diana’s mom. 

We started arranging her room, putting away clothes and diapers, and getting ready for her arrival – I find myself staring in her room in awe!  This tiny human, who isn’t even earth side yet is so loved beyond measure!  She has a purpose!  She has been set apart, and I KNOW that her life will have meaning and she will do great things!

I don’t have a clue what is in store for her, but I know it involves greatness!  I HAVE to believe that after being told time and time again that she would never exist, and BOOM here she is… there HAS to be something more to her life.

At the baby shower, I got to speak to everyone and thank everyone for coming.  I tried to keep my comments brief and light hearted – mainly because I am an emotional wreck… I could have bawled my eyes out just because everyone in the room was there to celebrate with me.  And while I do use humor to keep things light, I take my job as “mom” very seriously.  Probably more serious than most things in life. 

Brandon and I have been given this life to bring up in the ways of the Lord.  We have been entrusted by God to ensure that she is taken care of in every way, loved, and grows into her calling in Christ – whatever that may be!  A missionary, a preacher, a teacher, a worship leader, or just a simple die hard prayer warrior – she would come by ALL of those things honestly… she comes from a long line of nearly all of those.

I have already noticed a change in my husband – especially lately.  He has started to become more protective than he already was – worrying about the safety and security of our home while he is away at work.  He has started to think about what kind of dad he wants to be.  AND not to mention all of the things he has taken up since I pretty much come home and crash (growing a human is exhausting work!!)  To say that I have been blessed with the absolute best is a complete understatement!!

I have started to think about all the things I want to teach her – body positivity, loving the least of them, being kind to everyone, guarding her heart, and all the different things that I think are important.  I want her to grow up strong – strong in her faith, strong in her confidence, and somewhat strong willed to know exactly what she wants and will not tolerate!

We – all 3 of us, Brandon, Diana, and myself – have been chosen by God!  We have been chosen to do His perfect will, whatever that may be!  We have been given this new kind of life – parents!  We have been given this new kind of life – DIANA!!

We don’t take this lightly, even if we do make jokes about letting the dog lick her clean instead of a bath.