No Pain, No Gain; The Perils of Losing a Toenail vs. Losing Focus

First, let me apologize for the blog post coming so late.  It was a very busy day, and quite honestly... I was lacking a topic.

And then I went to Judo tonight...

I want to start off by stating that I will, in no way shape or form be complaining.  I learned quite a bit about myself tonight.

I got to Judo just in time to realize that we were working on technique, since most of our class is going to the North/South Judo Competition - More on this later.  I was NOT left out of those working.  I worked technique on the 3 throws that I know, my o soto gari needs work, but it will come in time.

We worked our Ne Waza - mat work.  Starting on our knees, we had to take the other down and either keep them there, or fight for guard.  I did pretty well, but I know I need to learn to protect my throat better.  No worries, I am fine.

This is where the possibility of losing focus could have come into play.  We started our group cardio workout.  It started with sprints from 1 end of the mat to the other, 5 sit ups at one end and 5 push ups at the other.  Eventually, we were changed from sprints to crab walk.  And this is where my lunch started to make its reappearance... I made it to a trash can, and didn't throw up much, mostly water, but enough that I threw up.  The cost of throwing up in a trash can in Judo - Changing the trash afterwards.

After pulling myself together, it would have been incredibly easy for me to sit down.  Or gather my things and leave (it was kind of embarrassing) Or run off to the locker room, and only come out after everyone had left for the evening.  But I didn't!  I took a few drinks of water, took some deep breathes, fixed my gi, and back to the mat I went.

I didn't jump right back in, as they were finishing up the runs.  Once they finished the last lap, we circled up and did what can only be called... the Circle of Death!

4 exercises - fast feet, mountain climbers, squats, and burpees.  All done as fast as possible, 1 at a time, for 20 seconds with 10 second "rest" in between.  Go through the set twice, and that's 1 round.  We did it twice.

Now, I can't do mountain climbers - so I held plank positions on my hands.  I didn't quit!  I can't do burpees - so I held a plank position on my arms.  I didn't quit!

While I was doing these reps, I kind of went into my own little world... I started thinking about all of the people who told me I couldn't do something.  I started thinking about all of the people who have cut me down for certain things, or others.  I thought about all of the times that I held myself back.  Or felt worthless.  Next thing I knew, it was over.

I was soaked in sweat, my knees were a little weak, but I DID NOT QUIT!  I pushed through, and went farther than I ever thought possible.

Am I perfect?  Certainly NO!  But I now know and understand just how far I am willing to go.

Now, the toenail... I am not sure when, how, or even where it happened... But after my shower, I noticed that my nail polish was chipped... Upon further inspection... MY TOENAIL HAD BEEN RIPPED OFF!!!  It doesn't hurt, it didn't bleed, and I promise I am fine.  Just another excuse to go get my toes done again.

Much love!!  Keep going!  You are doing this, no matter how great or small your accomplishment is, YOU brought yourself one step farther!

Excuses, excuses

I shouldn't use our being on vacation as an excuse, but we are on vacation so things are a little...um... not on target.

I haven't gone super overboard or anything, but Sunday is cheat day right?  Well, Monday by the time we left the gym we realized that nothing was open that was healthy and we hadn't set anything out to thaw... and so... I had taco bell.

I felt terrible about it after eating, and honestly I didn't feel that great anyway.  My stomach hurt, I felt heavy, and I just knew I didn't want anymore.  At least I feel like I have made progress.

Brandon and I were talking about reasons vs. excuses.  What do you consider a reason, and what do you consider an excuse?  While I don't think that being on vacation is a good reason to purposefully eat off plan and not do what is necessary, I do feel that its a relaxing time for me.  It's my vacation, I want to relax and not have to stress.  About anything.

So, is this an excuse? Is it a reason?  If it's a reason, is it a good one?  If it's an excuse, is it a bad one?

I feel horrible that my eating plan hasn't been on par.  I feel horrible that we haven't been to the gym every night while on vacation.  But what I absolutely do NOT feel horrible about is spending quality time with my husband.

Today, Wednesday, has been the only day on vacation that we haven't spent too much time together.  I had to go with my mom to her doctor appointment, and he chose to work on his car - which he is still doing.

What is a good reason to you?  What is a bad excuse?  Are you finding reasons not to get to work on yourself?  Are you letting excuses hold you back?

One thing I know for sure, I am not quitting.  I am not giving up... I am on vacation.